AustNode IRC Quotes Database

#42 (+|-) (Rated: 7)
* TheAstro30 farts on rain  
* Rain sticks fan in theastro30s ass  
* TheAstro30 turns in to a hover craft
* Rain presses the start button on the hover craft
<^bozoJim> haha
* TheAstro30 putts around the room
<TheAstro30> bbbbbbbbbbbbrrrrrooommmmmm

#54 (+|-) (Rated: 6)
<PugMug> when my sons were 7 and 5 I had to give them the "Pee Wee Herman Sermon"
<helly> haha what is that PugMug?
<PugMug> I basically told them that Pee Wee got arrested for wanking it in public.. it's natural but the pubic can't handle nature... so keep it to yourself

#84 (+|-) (Rated: 6)
* PugMug is wishing puggy would lay the fuck down on my lap instead of playing "lets stab mommy with these 80 kg toes and see how many bruises I can make"
<Just_Pax> feed him a hash cookie ;)
<PugMug> I don't have any to give her
<Just_Pax> bugger
<Just_Pax> hmmmmm
<Just_Pax> has puggy got her / his claw/toenails trimmed?
<PugMug> yes.. she just pushes really hard down on my legs.. it's her paw pads that do it

#12 (+|-) (Rated: 5)
<TheAstro30> I had macaroni cheese for dinner tonight ... just went to fart, nearly macaronied my pants

#57 (+|-) (Rated: 5)
<Rain> u catch any fish?
<helly> nah
<helly> too much fresh water
<helly> not even any bait around
<Kayla> or fisherman too shit ey
<helly> whatever
<helly> fuckk off
<Kayla> :D
<Rain> lol kayla

#75 (+|-) (Rated: 5)
* Kayla waits for PugMug to pass the bong around
* PugMug puffs and passes to Kayla
* Kayla passes out...light weight
<PugMug> lol

#123 (+|-) (Rated: 5)
[November 06, 2020 09:41:09 pm] <BorkO> Back
[November 06, 2020 09:41:28 pm] <Just_Pax> WB BorkO
[November 06, 2020 09:41:31 pm] <Sunbeam> wb Bork with an O
[November 06, 2020 09:41:32 pm] <BorkO> Thnx
[November 06, 2020 09:41:35 pm] <BorkO> :p
[November 06, 2020 09:41:38 pm] <Just_Pax> \o/ :D
[November 06, 2020 09:41:43 pm] <BorkO> This is mobile bork
[November 06, 2020 09:41:53 pm] <BorkO> Currently on an electric recliner ^^
[November 06, 2020 09:42:04 pm] <Just_Pax> Hello, mobile bork :)
[November 06, 2020 09:42:14 pm] <BorkO> Possibly one of my favourite things
[November 06, 2020 09:42:17 pm] <Sunbeam> hi there mobile BorkO :)
[November 06, 2020 09:42:54 pm] <Just_Pax> This is mobile bork.... how may i direct your call? ;)

#1 (+|-) (Rated: 4)
<Kayla> <helly> but nobody cares about that --- you still complaining?
<Kayla> evening everyone :)
<^bozoJim> hello Kayla
<Kayla> heya jim
<Rain> lmao kayla

#43 (+|-) (Rated: 4)

#52 (+|-) (Rated: 4)
<dave0> doh now i have to get up and go to the fridge
<Rain> get a mini fridge so u dont have to walk xD
<dave0> i need a slavegirl to get my beer and pat my hair
<^bozoJim> lol

#56 (+|-) (Rated: 4)
<helly> .w
<Forecast> Beerwah, Queensland, Australia (-26.850, 152.967) -- Moderate or heavy rain shower and 19° C
<helly> heavy is fucking right!
<helly> pissed down and our gutters overflowed
<helly> had to get out on the fucking ladder
<helly> which I hate
<helly> HATE!
<helly> in the rain
<helly> to clear out some of the fucking leaves
<helly> which I did
<helly> not that long ago!!
<helly> fuck the rain
<helly> and everyone who wished for it
<helly> now I am wet
<helly> and cranky
<Rain> LOL

#64 (+|-) (Rated: 4)
<Sarah> Hmmm. I think the good glass is in your lovely daughters room as a makeup cleaning cup
<helly> stop rubbing it in Sarah

#69 (+|-) (Rated: 4)
<helly> this dinner hates me tonight
<helly> cut some chilis for it
<helly> washed my hands
<helly> wiped my eye 5 mins later
<^bozojim> lol
<helly> burning chilli eye
<^bozojim> ouchies
<helly> sauce spat at me when I stirred it
<helly> burned my arm
<helly> then pouring the pasta water out
<helly> burnt my finger
<helly> fml
<helly> I swear I usually do a decent job
<helly> haha
<helly> it's just tonight that seems to have gone wrong for me
<helly> haha
<helly> fucking hell

#110 (+|-) (Rated: 4)
[June 23, 2020 07:15:01 pm] <TimeShift> Users who spent more than 1 hour    on #austnode are: Midget
[June 23, 2020 07:15:17 pm] <Midget> YAY
[June 23, 2020 07:15:28 pm] <Midget> im a weiner
[June 23, 2020 07:15:36 pm] <Just_Pax> CONGRATULATIONS!
[June 23, 2020 07:15:42 pm] <TheAstro30> im a hotdog bun
[June 23, 2020 07:16:18 pm] <Midget> do we have sauce?
[June 23, 2020 07:17:16 pm] <Just_Pax> I'm the sauce ;)
[June 23, 2020 07:17:19 pm] <Rain> lmao

#118 (+|-) (Rated: 4)
[August 08, 2020 08:02:10 pm] <Astro> i have a big dick
[August 08, 2020 08:02:21 pm] <Rain> u want a gold star?
[August 08, 2020 08:02:22 pm] <Rain> lol
[August 08, 2020 08:02:27 pm] <Astro> yes please
[August 08, 2020 08:03:45 pm] * bork hands astro a fleshlight. May the force be with you
[August 08, 2020 08:04:00 pm] * Astro stick it up your ass
[August 08, 2020 08:04:32 pm] * bork shines it at astro
[August 08, 2020 08:04:55 pm] * Astro reflects in a mirror back at bork
[August 08, 2020 08:05:23 pm] * bork dies of horror.
[August 08, 2020 08:05:31 pm] <Astro> cool
[August 08, 2020 08:05:53 pm] * Astro takes pictures and uploads them to snapchat
[August 08, 2020 08:06:25 pm] * bork ghost haunts astro
[August 08, 2020 08:06:40 pm] * Astro doesn't believe in ghost
[August 08, 2020 08:06:42 pm] <Astro> :P

#122 (+|-) (Rated: 4)
[October 30, 2020 02:14:50 pm] <TheAstro30> wow, 2 and a half glasses of rum earlier this morning turned my shit black
[October 30, 2020 02:14:50 pm] <Just_Pax> does it usually do that?
[October 30, 2020 02:14:50 pm] <Just_Pax> better that and not green vodka cruisers, yeah?
[October 30, 2020 02:14:50 pm] <Just_Pax> cause green poo's are just outright strange

#4 (+|-) (Rated: 3)
<DragonsBlood> Next, on Judge Judy, musicdrummer says the makes of Sherlock did a terrible job and is suing them for $5000 for lost time, the defendants say "tough"
<Pegasus`Dragon>  ha ha ha snort *CHOKE* ha ha ha snort Oh My....  
<musicdrummer> I really want to sue. Everybody liked Mary
<Rain> hahahahhaha

#14 (+|-) (Rated: 3)
<ekcdd> <AlertServ> Tasmania 09/16:05 EST Marine Wind Warning Summary for Tasmania <ekcdd> Casued by Jason's excessive farting
<TheAstro30> and bullshit, adam

#15 (+|-) (Rated: 3)
<helly> it's not even that cold ffs
<Kayla> shut up, i love my air con
<helly> yet Kayla is blasting the aircon at 26, I am sweating my arse off haha
<Kayla> shit, lets not move to Tassie

#19 (+|-) (Rated: 3)
<helly> did you see my first act as staff?  
<helly> [20:13:48] -OperServ- Kayla has been joined to #iamaweiner.
<Kayla> you're an idiot helly
<Kayla> lol

#23 (+|-) (Rated: 3)
<Kayla> haha no one listens to you
* helly cattle prods Kayla
<Kayla> :o
<Kayla> how rude
<helly> I'll show you something rude!
<Kayla> no thanks
<helly> :o
<Rain> LOL
<Rain> told!
<Kayla> he knows his place, he just tests the boundaries a child  

#36 (+|-) (Rated: 3)
<Kayla> glad you waited helly, you picked shit one lol
<helly> haha fuck off
<helly> it was good
<Kayla> was tiny
<helly> I've obviously got you accustomed to large things :P
<Kayla> indeedy

#50 (+|-) (Rated: 3)
<helly> get some of this into you Rain
* helly flashes gang signs

#51 (+|-) (Rated: 3)
<helly> people like that piss me off, it's why I couldn't do a job like Kaylas
<helly> I'd be like "knock knock" on the door, and then in their face when the door opened haha <Kayla> flashing your gang sign at them helly?
<helly> lol  

#53 (+|-) (Rated: 3)
<helly> haha Kayla is cold
<helly> she is hair dryering herself
<helly> it's fucking 26 degrees in here
<helly> and she still cold  
<Pinky> Lol hair drying herself

#74 (+|-) (Rated: 3)
<helly> didn't get to sleep until like midnight because of the stupid dog
<helly> she was just being a noisy snoring bitch
<helly> I turned the air con on and the tv louder
<helly> and I could still hear her
<helly> it was making me so angry
<helly> knowing I had to get up early
<helly> most of the time it is just a bit annoying
<helly> but fuck I was mad
<helly> I kicked her out of her bed
<helly> and she looked at me like WTF man
<helly> told her to shut her fucking face up
<helly> so groaned and went back to her bed
<helly> she was being a fucking stupid bitch faced cunt of a dog
<mozza> LMAO
<Rain> wonder why dogs snore
<Rain> so much anger ;p
<Rain> prob must be very tired
<helly> cos she is a fat cunt of a dog
<helly> lol

#79 (+|-) (Rated: 3)
<Just_Pax> mum just farted ;)
<helly> lmfao
<Rain> lol pax
<Just_Pax> she just stood there and let a good one rip in front of me ;)
<Kayla> oh god
<Rain> rofl pax
<Rain> hahaha
<Rain> and u didnt pass out pax?
<Just_Pax> no regard for what i thought!
<Just_Pax> nah
<Rain> <Just_Pax> she just stood there and let a good one rip in front of me ;) <--you took it like a champ
<Just_Pax> lol Rainy!

#83 (+|-) (Rated: 3)
<^bozoJim> aww
<^bozoJim> croaked it?
<Just_Pax> nah :)
<Just_Pax> weird, it came up stairs
<^bozoJim> cane toad?
<Just_Pax> jumped on my foot and jumped off again
<Just_Pax> yep
<^bozoJim> yikes
<Just_Pax> yeah, scared me a bit, too!
<Just_Pax> Me to the cane toad : Errm, you're not supposed to do that to my foot unannounced
<Just_Pax> CaneToad : FU ;)
<Rain> lol pax

#87 (+|-) (Rated: 3)
<Rain> im gonna take a quick shower shortly
<Rain> i need a good wash xD
<Rain> armpits are yelling out to me washhhhh meeeee
<Just_Pax> yeah, my groin is starting to get a bit smelly, too ;)
<Rain> lol
<Rain> funny pax
<Just_Pax> when it starts to smell like an unkempt fish market, means it's time to have a shower ;)
<Just_Pax> You know i am :)
<Rain> lol a fish market
<Rain> :o
<Just_Pax> not a clean one
* helly gags
<Just_Pax> an unkempt one :P
<Just_Pax> yeah, hehe
<Rain> lol look what u did to helly lol
<Just_Pax> yeah, i stole his ducky ;)
* Just_Pax is now known as Scotchy_McScotchFace
* Scotchy_McScotchFace is now known as Scrathy_McCrotchFace
* Scrathy_McCrotchFace is now known as Scratchy_McCrotchFace
* Scrathy_McCrotchFace is now known as Scratchy_McCrotchFace
<Scratchy_McCrotchFace> seems to be a rather fitting nick right now :)
<Rain> rofl

#101 (+|-) (Rated: 3)
<Moose> I'm terrified of making lefts cause NJ doesnt have left turns. Everyone is routed through the right lanes. Here they have lefts with dedicated turn lanes and lights.
<Moose> I end up making 3 rights cause I dont trust the left hand turn lights. >.>
<PugMug> I hate that... and if you're not careful.. you'll circle a mall
<Moose> Lmao it's cute you think we have malls here
<PugMug> in NJ
<Moose> Ah yeah. Theres one every 5 feet.
<Moose> Born and raised there
<Moose> Been to almost every mall in the state.
<PugMug> I've been to NJ... hated it.. I swear when they were making the road.. they tossed some noodles on the floor and said.. that'll do
<Moose> Lmao
<Rain> <PugMug> I've been to NJ... hated it.. I swear when they were making the road.. they tossed some noodles on the floor and said.. that'll do <--should have offered some weed that'll make them do a better job ;p
<PugMug> lol

#112 (+|-) (Rated: 3)
[June 28, 2020 03:48:54 pm] <Moose> 1AM. Perfect time to make mac and cheese.
[June 28, 2020 03:49:28 pm] <Just_Pax> acid and cheese ;)
[June 28, 2020 03:49:49 pm] <Just_Pax> trippin' while you're dippin ;)
[June 28, 2020 03:50:06 pm] <Moose> No. Just no.
[June 28, 2020 03:50:45 pm] <Just_Pax> fondue kit on an acid trip ;)
[June 28, 2020 03:51:04 pm] <Janet> I'd be in a lot of trouble if I was allergic to semen.
[June 28, 2020 03:51:25 pm] <Just_Pax> dont spill it on your lap or it'll go splat

#114 (+|-) (Rated: 3)
[July 15, 2020 03:18:59 pm] <bork> Aaaaaaaafternoon
[July 15, 2020 03:19:06 pm] <Rain> hey tork the bork xD
[July 15, 2020 03:19:16 pm] <bork> ^^ yeah!
[July 15, 2020 03:19:38 pm] <Just_Pax> bork man ;)
[July 15, 2020 03:19:41 pm] * bork has been cleared by the doc
[July 15, 2020 03:19:47 pm] <Rain> great news
[July 15, 2020 03:19:50 pm] <Just_Pax> ooooh :)
[July 15, 2020 03:19:54 pm] <bork> No serious probs. They want to look in my gi
[July 15, 2020 03:19:55 pm] * Rain gives bork some beers
[July 15, 2020 03:19:56 pm] <Just_Pax> sweet :)
[July 15, 2020 03:19:58 pm] <bork> Tum though
[July 15, 2020 03:20:03 pm] <bork> Endoscope soon
[July 15, 2020 03:20:12 pm] <Rain> is that where they shove a cam up ur butt bork?
[July 15, 2020 03:20:22 pm] <Just_Pax> no rain :P
[July 15, 2020 03:20:31 pm] <Just_Pax> that's a colonoscopy

#6 (+|-) (Rated: 2)
<McFlyDaCSharpGuy> that bird in the morning is pissing me off tho  
<McFlyDaCSharpGuy> 6:05am it started attacking the fucking window
<McFlyDaCSharpGuy> so I got up, said fuck you, threw a pillow at window and it fucked off

#16 (+|-) (Rated: 2)
<helly> I feel attacked, I posted QUEENSLANDER! in a Go The Blues thread in a forum I visit. Their reply was - I hope we aren't typing to fast for you  
* helly cries
<Pinky> Hahahahhaha
<Kayla> suck it\

#17 (+|-) (Rated: 2)
<Pinky> Come on
* helly aims
<Pinky> Haha
<Pinky> Go away
<Pinky> :o
<Pinky> Take Kayla for a walk
<Pinky> Heheh
<helly> it's too cold outside for her
<helly> she'd complain the whole time  

#18 (+|-) (Rated: 2)
<Rain> brb toilet calls
<Kayla> are you over sharing again?
<Kayla> :D

#20 (+|-) (Rated: 2)
<PugMug> I suck.. I don't remember what mine is... and I'm too stoned to remember... don't judge... lol
<Pinky> LOL
<Pinky> Hahahah

#22 (+|-) (Rated: 2)
<Rain> .gag helly  
<helly> :o
<Kayla> takes more than that to shut him up

#26 (+|-) (Rated: 2)
* Rain wonders where theastro30 has been
<Revolver> his gone wanking ... em i mean walking Laughing Out Loud

#27 (+|-) (Rated: 2)
<Pinky> Some people get paid to sing for a living. ME.. people pay me to stop singing lol

#29 (+|-) (Rated: 2)
<Kayla> though will enjoy my bed tonight!
<helly> errr
<helly> I have to share with you again??  
<mozza> omg
<mozza> shut up helly :P
<mozza> kayla put him on the lounge haha  
<helly> that's her spot lol
<mozza> lmaooooooooooooo  

#30 (+|-) (Rated: 2)
<Pinky> I'm a shocker camping :/
<Kayla> haha how so?
<helly> like pass out drunk before the tent is up shocker?
<helly> :P
<Pinky> Last time I went camping I chased some dude with a fry pan lol  
<Kayla> :o
<helly> lol  

#31 (+|-) (Rated: 2)
<Kayla> bbs, helly is being demanding
<mozza> hahahaaa
<Kayla> xx
<mozza> i wont ask what for

#38 (+|-) (Rated: 2)
<Kayla> our internet seems to be playing up a bit last night/today too
<Kayla> helly thinks that smallest brat has tried to do something to it lol

#46 (+|-) (Rated: 2)
<DrEggman> I'm in the shower
<TheAstro30> with your phone talking on IRC?
<Rain> waterproof phone ?
<DrEggman> Yes
<TheAstro30> I cant get the image of him naked talking on IRC out of my head

#55 (+|-) (Rated: 2)
<Pinky> I want to lose 10
<PugMug> I still have a ways to go.. I just need to get this whole blood pressure thing wankered out
<PugMug> I need to lose another 45 kilos...ugh
<helly> feel free to donate 10-15 this way :)  
<Pinky> Haha helly

#65 (+|-) (Rated: 2)
<Rain> m00
* Kayla is bored
<Kayla> helly is watching Love Island with missy, ffs
<Sarah> Kayla: someone said that Love is for girls and gays,
<Kayla> i refuse to watch that shite

#67 (+|-) (Rated: 2)
<helly> haha tornadoes
<helly> fuck tornadoes
<helly> bring on a new plauge
<Kayla> NO
<helly> let natural selection cull some of the fuckwits
<Kayla> no germs
<Kayla> i can't deal
<helly> natural disasters don't cull enough people
<Kayla> depends

#68 (+|-) (Rated: 2)
<Rain> whats kayla doing now
<helly> they've been smashing out the big bash ads lately
<helly> Kayla is reading
<helly> ofcourse
<Rain> of course lol
<Rain> surprised she doesnt become a teacher
<Rain> or a librayian
<Rain> read read read lol
<helly> lol
<helly> I know right
<helly> she picked up 4 new books on Monday
<Rain> what kind this time?
<helly> same shit as usual
<helly> it's a series she is reading
<Rain> ohh 4 books geez
<Rain> that give her a good few days to read them all
<helly> she's half way through one of them
<helly> by the looks of it
<Rain> fuck shes a fast reader lol
<helly> I like to put her books back a page or two
<helly> when she is not looking
<Rain> LMAO
<Rain> thats fkn mean ;p
<helly> hahaha yep
<helly> I do it to the kids too

#80 (+|-) (Rated: 2)
[February 08, 2020 10:55:16 am] <helly> heya PugMug
[February 08, 2020 10:55:19 am] <helly> how's things today
[February 08, 2020 10:55:32 am] <PugMug> quiet so far.. you?
[February 08, 2020 10:55:47 am] <helly> same here
[February 08, 2020 10:56:25 am] <helly> I got a dog I am giving away! Want her!!?
[February 08, 2020 10:57:10 am] <helly> cos if you don't take her she is going in the bin!
[February 08, 2020 11:11:25 am] <PugMug> I can't afford her
[February 08, 2020 11:13:42 am] <helly> oh well in the bin it is!
[February 08, 2020 11:13:42 am] <helly> haha
[February 08, 2020 11:19:32 am] <Kayla> you're not putting my doggo in the bin
[February 08, 2020 11:19:40 am] <helly> well then
[February 08, 2020 11:19:50 am] <helly> how about I open the gate and let her "go for a run"
[February 08, 2020 11:19:55 am] <Kayla> :o
[February 08, 2020 11:20:11 am] <helly> or I could take her fishing and "let her chase the bait into the water"
[February 08, 2020 11:20:18 am] <Kayla> :(
[February 08, 2020 11:20:42 am] <Kayla> she just doesn't want wet feet
[February 08, 2020 11:21:00 am] <helly> oh what fucking princess bullshit is that!
[February 08, 2020 11:21:11 am] <Kayla> lol
[February 08, 2020 11:21:13 am] <helly> she's a cunt
[February 08, 2020 11:21:28 am] <Kayla> she's been hanging out with you too much :P
[February 08, 2020 11:21:35 am] <helly> :o
[February 08, 2020 01:42:44 pm] <Rain> bwahahaha
[February 08, 2020 01:42:50 pm] <Rain> what u two fighting about now ;p
[February 08, 2020 02:14:32 pm] <Kayla> rain - my doggo pissed beside his smoking chair :P
[February 08, 2020 02:14:58 pm] <helly> after taking a dump inside this morning
[February 08, 2020 02:15:04 pm] <helly> and pissing in the house the night before
[February 08, 2020 02:15:14 pm] <helly> and pissing in my smoking spot the day before
[February 08, 2020 02:15:15 pm] <Kayla> and taking a dump inside the day before?
[February 08, 2020 02:15:22 pm] <helly> and doing a dump near it the day before that
[February 08, 2020 02:15:25 pm] <Kayla> lol
[February 08, 2020 02:15:32 pm] <helly> fucking cunt of a dog
[February 08, 2020 02:15:34 pm] <Kayla> she doesn't like going down the side in the rain!
[February 08, 2020 02:15:43 pm] <helly> obviously
[February 08, 2020 02:15:44 pm] <Kayla> she's fully annoying
[February 08, 2020 02:15:54 pm] <Kayla> but she's not going in the bin
[February 08, 2020 02:15:57 pm] <Kayla> or for a run
[February 08, 2020 02:16:00 pm] <Kayla> or for a swim
[February 08, 2020 02:16:28 pm] <helly> maybe she'll "find" some chocolate
[February 08, 2020 02:16:42 pm] <Kayla> maybe she'll find herself at the vet with a big bill...
[February 08, 2020 02:16:50 pm] <Kayla> to fix her i mean lol
[February 08, 2020 02:17:19 pm] <Kayla> remember helly, she's the same dog we were discussing not paying thousands to fix when she got bitten by the snake
[February 08, 2020 02:17:25 pm] <Kayla> and you said we should pay...
[February 08, 2020 02:17:42 pm] <helly> she hadn't pissed in my spot at that point
[February 08, 2020 02:17:43 pm] <helly> haha
[February 08, 2020 02:17:51 pm] <Kayla> i'm sure she had at some other time
[February 08, 2020 02:18:22 pm] <helly> I'm going to spray her with the hose if she does it again
[February 08, 2020 02:18:26 pm] <helly> doesn't like being wet
[February 08, 2020 02:18:27 pm] <Kayla> she won't care
[February 08, 2020 02:18:30 pm] <helly> we'll see about tha
[February 08, 2020 02:18:41 pm] <Kayla> she'll just sulk and do it again later
[February 08, 2020 02:18:55 pm] <Kayla> probs just to piss you off then too